GALACTIC FAMILIES

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WE ARE ALL PART OF CREATION AND WE SHOULD LEARN TO BE A FAMILY,HUMANS PLANTS ANIMALS,ALIENS,STARS AND STONES,EVERYTHING IS ONE.WHAT KEEPS US TOGETHER IS LOVE.WHAT DIVIDES US IS EGO.
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GALACTIC FAMILIES
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The for agreements
by don Miguel Ruiz
audiobook

https://soundcloud.com/i-am-bear-love/sets/the-four-agreements

by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
The Shift And The
Hundredth Monkey Effect
by Owen Waters



The Shift And The
Hundredth Monkey Effect
by Owen Waters


Japanese snow monkeys, Macaca fuscata


The Shift is the awakening of humanity’s heart. This transformation of consciousness, the greatest one ever recorded, first became apparent in the mid-1960s and has been building momentum ever since.

The Shift is a collective transformation consisting of the sum of each individual’s step into the New Reality. Each person, in their own time, is moving forward into a stage of consciousness which brings a wider vista and an awareness which springs from the heart. When enough people’s primary attention becomes focused through their heart chakras, then the ‘hundredth monkey effect’ will occur.

The Hundredth Monkey Effect was first introduced by biologist Lyall Watson in his 1980 book, ‘Lifetide.’ He reported that Japanese primatologists, who were studying Macaques monkeys in the wild in the 1950s, had stumbled upon a surprising phenomenon.

His book was soon followed up with a deeply inspired work by Ken Keyes in 1981, called “The Hundredth Monkey Effect.” In this, Ken Keyes made an impassioned appeal for an end to the Cold War and its policy of mutually assured destruction. Here, in the words of Ken Keyes, is a description of the key elements of the Hundredth Monkey Effect:

“The Japanese monkey, Macaca fuscata, had been observed in the wild for a period of over 30 years.

“In 1952, on the island of Koshima, scientists were providing monkeys with sweet potatoes dropped in the sand. The monkeys liked the taste of the raw sweet potatoes, but they found the dirt unpleasant.

“An 18-month-old female named Imo found she could solve the problem by washing the potatoes in a nearby stream. She taught this trick to her mother. Her playmates also learned this new way and they taught their mothers too.

“This cultural innovation was gradually picked up by various monkeys before the eyes of the scientists.

“Between 1952 and 1958 all the young monkeys learned to wash the sandy sweet potatoes to make them more palatable.

“Only the adults who imitated their children learned this social improvement. Other adults kept eating the dirty sweet potatoes.

“Then something startling took place. In the autumn of 1958, a certain number of Koshima monkeys were washing sweet potatoes -- the exact number is not known.

“Let us suppose that when the sun rose one morning there were 99 monkeys on Koshima Island who had learned to wash their sweet potatoes.

“Let's further suppose that later that morning, the hundredth monkey learned to wash potatoes.

“Then it happened!

“By that evening almost everyone in the tribe was washing sweet potatoes before eating them.

“The added energy of this hundredth monkey somehow created an ideological breakthrough!

“But notice.

“A most surprising thing observed by these scientists was that the habit of washing sweet potatoes then jumped over the sea –

“Colonies of monkeys on other islands and the mainland troop of monkeys at Takasakiyama began washing their sweet potatoes.

“Thus, when a certain critical number achieves an awareness, this new awareness may be communicated from mind to mind.

“Although the exact number may vary, this Hundredth Monkey Phenomenon means that when only a limited number of people know of a new way, it may remain the conscious property of these people.

“But there is a point at which if only one more person tunes-in to a new awareness, a field is strengthened so that this awareness is picked up by almost everyone!”

Lyall Watson had originally researched and assembled the story from the available testimonies of the primate researchers. Because the phenomenon took the researchers so much by surprise, they had not counted how many monkeys it took to trigger this effect. So, Watson proposed an arbitrary figure of ninety-nine monkeys, and said that one more, the so-called one-hundredth monkey, would then provide the critical mass of consciousness necessary to trigger the effect.

The new behavior pattern spread to most, but not all, of the monkeys. Older monkeys, in particular, remained steadfast in their established behavior patterns and resisted change. When the new behavior pattern suddenly appeared among monkey troupes on other islands, only a few monkeys on those islands picked up on the new idea. The ones most receptive to new ideas started imitating the new behavior and demonstrating it to the impressionable younger ones. Thus, they too began their own path towards their eventual hundredth monkey effect.





How the Hundredth Monkey Effect Works

The mechanism for this transference of ideas works the same way for monkeys as it does for all sentient beings. We exist within an atmosphere of global mind. The human brain is constantly receiving and transmitting mental pictures and information to and from that mental atmosphere in which we are immersed.

The global mind, otherwise known as Jung’s collective unconscious, does not cease to function because a few skeptics don’t like its effects. It functions just like it always has, passing information from one individual to another based upon their common frequency of consciousness. If progressive monkeys had a new idea, then so did other progressive monkeys on other islands. They resonated at the same frequency of consciousness.

Inventions often occur at the same time by inventors who are not in physical contact with each other. For example, in 1941, Les Paul designed and built the first solid-body electric guitar just when Leo Fender of Fender Musical Instruments was doing exactly the same thing.

Have you ever had an idea, then seen other people express or use that idea. You probably said, “Hey! I thought of that first!” Well, that’s the way the global mind works. It’s an atmosphere that you share with all other sentient beings, but you tune in especially to the particular topics and frequencies of mind that interest you the most.

What This means to The Shift

When enough people have gone through their personal version of The Shift to the new consciousness, then a critical mass will form and suddenly everyone will become aware of the New Reality and its heart-centered values.

That is the day when heart-centered values will become the focus of everyday thinking for the vast majority of people. That is the day when humanity will begin to look back on what has changed and realize that a massive shift has occured.


This article was written by Owen Waters, author of
"The Shift: The Revolution in Human Consciousness"
and the Infinite Being Insight E-Books

by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
How prayer, words and music affect the structure of water

Another experiment done in the 1990’s also supports the idea that water is an intelligent element. Dr. Masaru Emoto performed experiments that involved speaking to water and observing the effects of various exposures to water, including prayer, words, music and other environmental elements.

For example, the words “You make me sick” and “I will kill you” made the water splash into an asymmetrical form that was ugly and did not have any real shape or form. The words “thank you” and “love and appreciation” formed beautiful and symmetrical patterns that very much resembled snowflakes. As you can tell, the water stamped with positive words is far more symmetrical and aesthetically pleasing than that stamped with dark, negative phrases.

When water was exposed to the music of Beethoven and Mozart, the water crystals were transformed into the shape of flowers or diamonds. The water responds to the vibrations of the music and forms shapes depending on the sound vibrations. These water memory experiments show that water memory may not be a hoax.
According to Emoto: When clear tubes of water are placed over positive and negative words, the structure of water crystals change. Water crystals increase in beauty when placed over the word “peace,” but are transformed to dark and ugly crystals when placed over the word “war.” When water is placed over the word “let’s,” the crystals expand and increase in beauty. However, when water is placed over the word “must,” the crystals become ugly with a dark green center. Emoto says water is letting us realize the hidden power of words.

These experiments are a testament to the intelligence and consciousness of water. Too often, we believe that humans are the only conscious beings on the planet, and therefore that we can take advantage of resources to the extent that we decide. However, water is truly an intelligent element and humans need to learn to respect all of the Earth and its elements so that we can continue to live on this planet.

by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
inteligent water
Many of us know that the Earth is made up of more water (H2O) than land, and the human body needs water to support life. Water is a necessary element of life for humans, plants, and other living creatures that share the Earth as a home. It is an essential part of living, which is why it needs to be conserved and taken care of to ensure that humans and other life forms can continue to survive and thrive on this planet.

When humans are born, they contain 80 percent water. As time goes on, this water seems to dehydrate as many people only contain about 50 percent of water at death. Chronic dehydration is a serious issue, especially in older adults. Water is a necessary element for proper body functioning, including eliminating wastes, arthritis, and many other symptoms.

The evidence proving that water has some form of memory

Scientists have long wondered what the properties are of this necessary substance, and although it has been acknowledged that hydrogen and oxygen are the makeup for water, there may be more to the substance than we ever imagined. Scientist Jacques Benveniste has been studying the scientific properties of water and has found two mysterious properties of water.

If a substance is dissolved in water, the water will carry memories of that property even if the molecules of the added substance are no longer detectable.
The molecules of a substance have a frequency spectrum, and if the spectrum is digitally recorded and added to pure water, the water will retain knowledge of the actual substance and will act as if that substance had actually been added.
Since water seems to have some kind of memory, when it is polluted with contaminants, the water can carry the memories of the properties of these contaminants, even after the contaminants are filtered out. Right now, there are pharmaceuticals (among other things) in drinking water, which no water treatment plant was ever designed to remove. Our drinking water is holding the properties of contaminants in its “memory” which can affect our health.

These mysterious powers of water are important to acknowledge, because they can help us understand why water has strong healing properties and why it is essential for life to exist. Unfortunately, our water supply is being depleted at an alarming rate, and conservations efforts are at a disadvantage because we have already depleted so much of our water resources. Freshwater that is safe for drinking is being contaminated by pharmaceutical drugs, birth control hormones, sodium fluoride, and other added elements that are simply unnecessary and even harmful.

Learning the findings of this study should alarm us even further, because it has been proved that we cannot simply purify contaminants in water and think that the water is back to its original and pure natural state. Once a foreign element has been added to the water, the water will retain the energy of the foreign element and will mimic the element as if it were still present.

by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
What Is Sex Magic?
Most of us want to lead better lives. We want to be happier, healthier, wealthier, and so on. We’d like to take control of what happens to us, instead of being at the mercy of chance, fate, or the agendas of other people. That’s why most magicians do spells in the first place; magic enables you to harness the raw energy in the universe and direct it to produce the outcomes you choose. Magic lets you attract what you desire in life and protect yourself from pitfalls. Although you can do this with any type of magic, sex magic is an especially effective way to accomplish your objectives. What Is Sex Magic? First, let me explain what sex magic isn’t. Sex magic isn’t some sort of kinky parlor game. It’s not intended to jazz up a lackluster love life or increase your chances of getting laid on Saturday night. The main purpose isn’t even sexual enjoyment or procreation. Having said all that, however, it’s quite likely your intimate relationships and sexual satisfaction will improve as a result of practicing sex magic––that just isn't the primary objective. Sex magic is a means to an end, a way to mobilize the amazing creative power of sexual energy to generate a desired result. Basically, you do sex magic for the same reasons you would do any other type of magic: to cause something you desire to happen. Your goal might be to promote healing or attract money or achieve spiritual enlightenment. When you add sexual energy, you increase the intensity of a magic spell. It’s like adding more octane to gasoline.

by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
UNITING MIND AND BODY
Sexual energy is life energy. Its nature is to create. In the most rudimentary sense, the union of male and female spawns a physical child. However, every sexual act creates a "child" on the spiritual plane, regardless of whether a flesh-and-blood baby is produced on the material plane. During sex, you plant "seeds" with your thoughts into the fertile "womb" of the cosmic matrix. You impregnate the matrix with what’s known as a magical child. Your thoughts and emotions are the hammer and chisel with which you carve your reality from the raw material of the universe: energy. Twenty-five hundred years ago, the Buddha said, "With our thoughts, we make the world." In essence, what this means is that everything we experience in our sensory world evolves from our individual and collective thoughts. To successfully perform magic of any kind you need a focused mind––and sex really focuses your attention. "Orgasm, by its very nature, requires your total participation," writes Margo Anand in The Art of Sexual Ecstasy. During orgasm you’re utterly present, completely in the moment. And when you do sex magic you kick things up a notch. You throw another log on the fire and fan the flames. Sex magic propels you into a mind-body-spirit experience. Your mind creates an intention, your body provides the fuel, and Spirit guides the result.
by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
Be careful about what information you let in our subconscious mind

The subconscious mind does not know reality; so should we be careful about what information we let into it?
Since it is a collector of informations, feelings, and thoughts. Should we treat it like it is an small child and only allow in what we want it to learn and know since it can not distinguish between right or wrong, good or bad, reality or fiction. It creates what ever the conscious mind tells it to consciously and unconsciously since sometimes we send it thoughts we are unaware of.
Many images and experiences bombard us every day and will have very little or no long-lasting effect, however it is the information which is repeatedly impressed upon our subconscious mind which stays with us and affects us. Remember, Mr. Haanel refers to the conscious mind as the 'watchman at the gate', and with good reason.

by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
The subconscious mind does not perceive the dualistic reality

Maybe a better way of saying this is that the subconscious mind does not perceive the dualistic reality, that we experience with our five senses. The subconscious does not know the difference between good and bad, big and small, up and down... And this is what makes it so immensely powerful.
You can imagine it as a fertile soil that will nourish any seed (i.e. conscious thought) that you put into it. Just as the soil doesn't care whether the seed of a rose, an apple tree or weed is planted, the subconscious mind does not care if you "seed" thoughts that you perceive to be good or bad - it will nourish all of them equally and will eventually bring them into your experience. Therefore we can say that the subconscious doesn't know (dualistic) reality.
by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
The origins of human beings according to ancient Sumerian texts

Sumerian mythology claims that, in the beginning, human-like gods ruled over Earth. When they came to the Earth, there was much work to be done and these gods toiled the soil, digging to make it habitable and mining its minerals.
The texts mention that at some point the gods mutinied against their labour.
Anu, the god of gods, agreed that their labour was too great. His son Enki, or Ea, proposed to create man to bear the labour, and so, with the help of his half-sister Ninki, he did. A god was put to death, and his body and blood was mixed with clay. From that material the first human being was created, in likeness to the gods.
This first man was created in Eden, a Sumerian word which means ‘flat terrain’. In the Epic of Gilgamesh , Eden is mentioned as the garden of the gods and is located somewhere in Mesopotamia between the Tigris and Euphrates rivers.
nitially human beings were unable to reproduce on their own, but were later modified with the help of Enki and Ninki. Thus, Adapa was created as a fully functional and independent human being. This ‘modification’ was done without the approval of Enki’s brother, Enlil, and a conflict between the gods began. Enlil became the adversary of man, and the Sumerian tablet mentions that men served gods and went through much hardship and suffering.
Adapa, with the help of Enki, ascended to Anu where he failed to answer a question about ‘the bread and water of life’. Opinions vary on the similarities between this creation story and the biblical story of Adam and Eve in Eden.
by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
Ways To Use The 'Law Of Attraction' To Find Your Soulmate

1. Be positively clear about what you want in a mate.
2. Continue to dream it.
3. Fall in love with yourself.
4. Say no to jealousy.
5. Don't give up.
6. Don't give in to doubt.
7. Enjoy yourself now.
8. Become the future you.
9. Get your beliefs in order.
10. Don't question how it will happen.
by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
Starseed Characteristics
From a young age, you have had an inherent wisdom that usually comes later in life for other people. You've been told you're an old soul and you agree. You feel ancient to the core. No matter where you are, you always have a feeling of homesickness. You know what home feels like, even if you can't express it, and you know that your house is not it. This may even lead to depression in some cases. Even as a child, you have always felt different. As though you are unique and others cannot understand you. You feel divided from the world -- As if it is a constant battle of "them" vs. "you." You often feel morally superior to others, regardless of education or social stature. Your sense of empathy is overwhelming. You feel different from those around you, however, you have a natural inclination to relate to their struggles. Your physical body is an enigma to doctors. It functions differently than everyone else's and the medical world struggles to understand it. This may manifest itself in ways as small as a lower than average body temperature or inability to withstand heat. You are incredibly intelligent but bored easily by traditional academics. You have had a paranormal or psychic experience. You may have seen a ghost, heard other's thoughts, had dreams that became reality, etc. You feel as though you have a purpose or mission to fulfill, but struggle to find what you want to do with your life. You lack the passion or intrigue to truly devote yourself to one area and understand the banality of life. The physical limitations of your body often frustrate you. You feel as though you should be able to do more but are vexed by your restrictions. This is because Starseeds remember far more freedom in their physical form. Your dreams are vivid and exceptional, and waking life never seems to measure up. Often, your dreams will seem other worldly -- as though your mind has created a completely separate universe. Others are often wary of you or feel uncomfortable in your presence. People instinctually know that you are different, but struggle to verbalize why. You may even feel isolated within your own family. You have very few friends, but those who are seem to understand you without need of explanation. Animals trust you and are naturally drawn to you. You understand them to the point that it feels as though you can communicate. The same is true for babies and small children. They find you fascinating and seem mesmerized in your presence. You can feel who people are without them ever saying a word. You see beyond the external façade and instinctually know when they are lying. You may seem rude in conversations because you know what the other person is going to say before they've even started. People think you are disinterested, when in reality you are frustrated by the pace of the conversation. You are interested in spirituality but see the divine beyond books and religion. You may not be able to put it into words, but you have a deep understanding that spirituality has always been an intrinsic part of you. You are drawn to metaphysics and the science behind other worlds. From a young age, you questioned the ways of society and still feel perplexed as to how other's don't see its mistakes. Though your dreams are exceptional, you've always had trouble sleeping. You have a natural ability to make others feel better - whether through medicine or your words. Strangers will often open up about their problems without even realizing it. People's first impression of you is often aloof or cold, however, one they get to know you they consider you to be one of the most loving people that they know. You avoid large crowds and find it hard to handle people in large doses -- even friends. To you, people are overwhelming and their emotions and actions seem chaotic. You have an ability to emotionally or spiritually grow much faster than those around you. Your sense of morality keeps you grounded, even when presented with emotions that are difficult for others to handle.

by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
ARE YOU A STARSEED?

Have you ever felt lonely or alienated? Like you just can't relate to anyone around you? There might be a reason for that. Starseeds are advanced beings that originate from far-distant stars and galaxies, whose mission is to assist earth into the Golden Age. They are highly evolved souls that have an unfathomable amount of wisdom hibernating in their core. Starseeds experience a total amnesia as to their true identities, however, each is encoded with an activation switch. Each "awakening" is unique and can range from measured and calm to abrupt and intense. When activated, Starseeds don't need to be told what they are, they inherently know. They recall their purpose on earth and where they're from with no explanations needed.

While there are many different beliefs as to the origins of Starseeds, their purpose is clear; they are on earth to be of service to mankind. They are not here to learn or study humans, but to assist our societies into a new age. While scientists will always question the belief in Starseeds, they can never disprove their existence.

Starseeds look, act and feel like normal human beings, however, they experience an innate loneliness and a longing to return home. While they are quick to discern human agendas, they find human behavior to be bewildering and irrational and are reluctant to involve themselves with society. One of the most telling Starseed characteristics is their feeling of genuine excitement upon learning that they might not be human after all. They are naturally drawn to the concept of space exploration and "science fiction" - from the belief in sentient life in distant galaxies to the science behind star ships. TV shows and movies such as E.T., Star Wars, and Star Trek provide comfort, for reasons they may not be able to express.
by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
The alien races book

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XPZSBPuqyLM
by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
Yoga For Erectile Dysfunction

2. Kumbhakasana
Kumbhakasan, also known as the plank pose, is known to help combat ED. This pose also enhances endurance during sexual performance. Upper body strength is also increased through this pose.

To do this pose, start by laying down flat on your stomach. You should keep your palms at the side of your face. Bend your feet in a way that your toes are pushing off the ground. You should now use your hands to push your body and raise your buttocks while keeping your legs parallel to the floor below you. This position should be held for as long as you possibly can. Only then slowly bring your body back to the starting position.
by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
Yoga For Erectile Dysfunction

1. Naukasana
Naukasana, also known as the boat pose, can help activate sexual hormones in men. The pose also helps men last longer in bed by strengthening their buttocks, thigh muscles, and hips. This pose can be combined with one of the top male enhancement pills for better effects.

This pose is done by lying down on the floor with your arms beside your body and feet against each other. Inhale. While keeping your arms straight, start to exhale. As you exhale, you should lift your feet and chest off the floor. This position should then be held for up to 10 consecutive breaths. Slowly breathe out and lower your feet and chest to the starting position.
by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
14 Ways to Resolve Conflicts and Solve Relationship Problems
BY SARI HARRAR
9. Be an equal-time advocate. Making sure each of you has the same opportunity to discuss concerns and solution ideas creates a sense of equality and shared power. If you tend to dominate, speak a little less and listen longer. Encourage your partner to say more. If you feel you’re getting short shrift, gently hold your ground if your partner interrupts or tries to move the discussion along too swiftly.

10. Take time-outs early and often. As soon as one of you feels too upset or negative to follow healthy problem-solving steps, it’s time to take a break. Experts say agreeing ahead of time to take a time-out if one partner becomes overwhelmed is crucial for avoiding a downward spiral you’ll only regret later. Include in your agreement the understanding that you’ll get back to your discussion within 24 hours. Some couples use a sports signal, such as the “T” sign coaches use, to indicate they need a break. Stop the discussion right away (no negotiating!), go to separate rooms or outdoors and calm down. Take a walk, read a book, cook a meal. Don’t spend your time ruminating about the conversation or having bad thoughts about your spouse. Before you talk again, first share an everyday activity together to re-establish a close, calm connection, Heitler suggests.

Five Ways to Sidestep a Fight
These strategies can stop a fight before it starts.

See things from your partner’s point of view.
Count to 50 before you say anything incendiary. This pause will help you calm down just long enough to think better of it.
Don’t throw verbal bombs. Avoid put-downs, personal attacks, judgments, criticism, and blaming — as well as sulking, interrupting, and stomping out of the room.
Ask yourself if you can — and should — solve the problem on your own.
Skip heavy conversations before breakfast and from 11 a.m. to 12 p.m. and 3:30 p.m. to 6 p.m. — because nobody should argue on an empty stomach. And ban problem-solving talks after about 8 p.m. Fatigue starts many fights!
Three Ways to Defuse a Runaway Argument
These tension-tamers can short-circuit an argument that’s getting too hot to handle.

Use anger as a red-alert sign to stop the discussion. Walk away and use meditation, exercise, or another pleasant activity to de-stress.
Reconnect frequently during tough conversations. Use empathy and appreciation to stay close to your spouse. And be on the lookout for your spouse’s attempts to heal or avoid breaches.
Soothe yourself and your spouse. Breathe deeply, slow down the conversation, and take a few minutes to review all the positive steps you’ve taken together to solve the problem already. Share your feelings. The more effectively you can soothe yourself and each other, the more productive your problem-solving session can be.
by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
Resolve Conflicts and Solve Relationship Problems
5. Beware of ice. A University of Wisconsin study that followed 97 newlywed couples into their third year of marriage found that spouses who give their mates the cold shoulder cause as much marital distress as those who dish out scathing sarcasm and caustic criticism. Icy behavior included pouting, stomping out of the room, showing a lack of interest in a partner’s emotional revelations, and more subtle brush-offs such as changing the subject, joking, or even buttering up a spouse to avoid discussing a sticky subject.

6. Learn from successful wives and husbands. Dr. Gottman says wives can improve the odds for a fruitful problem-solving session by starting conversations without confrontation. Try a “soft start-up” by talking about how you feel and asking for your mate’s input, instead of criticizing, blaming, or turning anger up to top volume. In contrast, husbands contributed to better conflict resolution when they accepted their wife’s influence. That means taking her opinions, ideas, and plans into consideration and developing a joint solution instead of a unilateral plan.

7. Seize the small opportunities. Practice problem-solving skills when tiny issues arise. “Moments with little bits of tension are perfect opportunities to work on your skills and experience success,” Dr. Heitler says. “Talk about each of your concerns; look for solutions. The more you do this, the more the whole tone of your relationship changes. Problems become a chance to come closer together and show each other how much we care, instead of danger zones full of irritation and hurt feelings.”

8. Be patient with yourself — and your mate. Learning problem-solving skills takes time. It’s a big job. You’re attempting to rewrite lessons about conflict resolution that you learned in childhood, and to practice new ways of communicating in highly emotional situations. Give yourself and your spouse credit for even the smallest steps forward — each improvement will propel you toward the next.


by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
Resolve Conflicts and Solve Relationship Problems
Step 3: Craft a Win-Win Strategy
Look for steps you can take to resolve the issue for both of you. This is crucial: Don’t tell your partner what he or she can do, but instead say what you can do. The best solutions usually aren’t your first ideas at all but may occur to you after looking at your concerns and figuring out what matters most to each of you.

Example:
You: “Maybe I could stay at home on Friday night and Saturday morning and get the tax stuff organized. Then I’d join you for the rest of the weekend without any worries hanging over me.”

Your spouse: “I would be willing to tell my parents you have to catch up with the taxes and can’t come for the whole weekend. I’m also willing to postpone our night out with the neighbors during the week and help you get the tax information together.”

10 More Tips to Help Avoid a Fight

Decide if you’ve got a problem or just a difference. If an issue isn’t threatening your health, safety, or financial security, doesn’t work against your shared vision for your marriage, and doesn’t put an unfair burden on you, then it may simply be a sign that the two of you are two different people. Perhaps you’re an extrovert and love parties, while your partner’s introvert personality makes him or her crave quiet nights at home. Perhaps you’re great at starting projects, while your partner’s terrific at sticking with it until every last detail is finished. Or maybe one of you is a morning person, the other a night owl. In that case, the solution is acceptance, not trying to change your partner. Look for the ways that your differences are marriage-strengthening assets.

1. Pick the right time. Problem solving is least likely to work when you’re tired, hungry, overloaded, stressed, distracted, or trying to do something else at the same time, such as making dinner, catching up on work from the office, or relaxing in front of the TV. Save big talks for a better time.

2. Practice loving acceptance. Learning the art of accepting and valuing your partner for who he or she is — instead of grousing about shortcomings — may actually help the two of you find better solutions to problems, experts say. This loving accommodation melts defenses and motivates us to want to please each other.

3. Banish the deal-breakers. University of Washington relationship expert John Gottman, Ph.D., advises couples to do all they can to avoid these lethal habits: personal criticism, sneering contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling.

4. Give your mate the benefit of the doubt. The next time you’re feeling disappointed, hurt, or angry with your spouse, pause before jumping to conclusions. Maybe your spouse is tired, hungry, or preoccupied — or doesn’t see the impact of his or her actions. Search for a benevolent explanation that will allow you to treat your mate with love and respect.


Step 3: Craft a Win-Win Strategy
Look for steps you can take to resolve the issue for both of you. This is crucial: Don’t tell your partner what he or she can do, but instead say what you can do. The best solutions usually aren’t your first ideas at all but may occur to you after looking at your concerns and figuring out what matters most to each of you.

Example:
You: “Maybe I could stay at home on Friday night and Saturday morning and get the tax stuff organized. Then I’d join you for the rest of the weekend without any worries hanging over me.”

Your spouse: “I would be willing to tell my parents you have to catch up with the taxes and can’t come for the whole weekend. I’m also willing to postpone our night out with the neighbors during the week and help you get the tax information together.”

10 More Tips to Help Avoid a Fight

Decide if you’ve got a problem or just a difference. If an issue isn’t threatening your health, safety, or financial security, doesn’t work against your shared vision for your marriage, and doesn’t put an unfair burden on you, then it may simply be a sign that the two of you are two different people. Perhaps you’re an extrovert and love parties, while your partner’s introvert personality makes him or her crave quiet nights at home. Perhaps you’re great at starting projects, while your partner’s terrific at sticking with it until every last detail is finished. Or maybe one of you is a morning person, the other a night owl. In that case, the solution is acceptance, not trying to change your partner. Look for the ways that your differences are marriage-strengthening assets.

1. Pick the right time. Problem solving is least likely to work when you’re tired, hungry, overloaded, stressed, distracted, or trying to do something else at the same time, such as making dinner, catching up on work from the office, or relaxing in front of the TV. Save big talks for a better time.

2. Practice loving acceptance. Learning the art of accepting and valuing your partner for who he or she is — instead of grousing about shortcomings — may actually help the two of you find better solutions to problems, experts say. This loving accommodation melts defenses and motivates us to want to please each other.

3. Banish the deal-breakers. University of Washington relationship expert John Gottman, Ph.D., advises couples to do all they can to avoid these lethal habits: personal criticism, sneering contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling.

4. Give your mate the benefit of the doubt. The next time you’re feeling disappointed, hurt, or angry with your spouse, pause before jumping to conclusions. Maybe your spouse is tired, hungry, or preoccupied — or doesn’t see the impact of his or her actions. Search for a benevolent explanation that will allow you to treat your mate with love and respect.


by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
Resolve Conflicts and Solve Relationship Problems
When problem-solving everyday issues becomes a tug-of-war over who’s right and who’s wrong, then settling even the smallest of discussions becomes a battle. “A better alternative is what I call the win-win waltz,” says marriage expert Susan Heitler, Ph.D., author of The Power of Two. “We toss information back and forth, we have an ‘aha!’ moment, and we come up with solutions that work very well for both of us.”

You’ll also free yourself from the emotional and physical side effects of nasty fighting, such as feeling you’ve intimidated or dominated your mate — or that you’ve given in and given up on what you really want. You’ll have fewer tense times together, and actually improve your health. Couples who learn to solve problems constructively together cut their risk for stress-related health problems including depression, cardiovascular disease, and lowered immunity.

Step 1: Describe the Problem in a Few Words — and Let Your Partner Respond
The opening round in problem-solving involves getting your overview of the issue out on the table. Don’t let it smolder or expect your partner to guess!

Example:
You: “If we go to your parents’ house for the weekend, I won’t be able to get our tax return information together before the workweek starts.”

Your spouse: “My parents have been planning for this visit for months. I don’t think we can or should just cancel.”

Step 2: Look Together at Deeper Concerns
This is the exploration phase. Don’t try to “sell” your point of view to your spouse. And don’t try to solve the problem just yet. Do talk about underlying worries and issues that contribute to the problem you’re trying to solve. And do listen carefully to your partner’s concerns. Keep an open mind. Learn all you can about your own concerns and your partner’s. Your goal: See the big picture and form a mental list of both partners’ concerns. This is your common set of concerns that you’ll try to resolve in Step 3.

Example:
You: “I have a new deadline at work and meetings three nights this week, plus we promised to visit the neighbors on Tuesday night. The tax deadline is almost here. I’m afraid I’ll be up until 3 a.m. trying to do all this during the week. I’ll be grouchy and won’t do my best at work, and I won’t be very interested in socializing with our neighbors or contribute much to the meetings. I’m feeling squeezed.”

Your spouse: “I really want to see my parents before they leave for their vacation. I haven’t spent much time with them in several months. Plus, my mother invited my aunt and uncle over to see us, too. It’s important to me to be with my parents for more than a short visit, and to feel at home. I’d like you to see them, too, and be with me for the big family dinner.”
by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
7 Solutions That Can Save a Relationship
Relationship Problem: Communication

All relationship problems stem from poor communication, according to Elaine Fantle Shimberg, author of Blending Families. "You can't communicate while you're checking your BlackBerry, watching TV, or flipping through the sports section," she says.

Problem-solving strategies:

Make an actual appointment with each other, Shimberg says. If you live together, put the cell phones on vibrate, put the kids to bed, and let voicemail pick up your calls.
If you can't "communicate" without raising your voices, go to a public spot like the library, park, or restaurant where you'd be embarrassed if anyone saw you screaming.
Set up some rules. Try not to interrupt until your partner is through speaking, or ban phrases such as "You always ..." or "You never ...."
Use body language to show you're listening. Don’t doodle, look at your watch, or pick at your nails. Nod so the other person knows you're getting the message, and rephrase if you need to. For instance, say, "What I hear you saying is that you feel as though you have more chores at home, even though we're both working." If you're right, the other can confirm. If what the other person really meant was, "Hey, you're a slob and you create more work for me by having to pick up after you," he or she can say so, but in a nicer way.
by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
The Tree of the Sephiroth
The Sephirothic Tree consists of ten globes of luminous splendor arranged in three vertical columns and connected by 22 channels or paths. The ten globes are called the Sephiroth and to them are assigned the numbers i to 10. The three columns are called Mercy (on the right), Severity (on the left), and, between them, Mildness, as the reconciling power. The columns may also be said to represent Wisdom, Strength, and Beauty, which form the triune support of the universe, for it is written that the foundation of all things is the Three. The 22 channels are the letters of the Hebrew alphabet and to them are assigned the major trumps of the Tarot deck of symbolic cards.
by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
EVERYTHING IS A MIRROR
Everyone is your mirror. This is the greatest of all relationships secrets and the only one you really need to understand to transform all your relationships. Here it is again - every single person in your life is your mirror. What this means is that others are simply reflecting parts of your own consciousness back to you, giving you an opportunity to really see yourself and ultimately to grow. The qualities you most admire in others are your own and the same goes for those qualities you dislike. To change anything in your relationships, be the change you want to see.

Mirror Mirror on the Wall: Learn to recognise yourself in other people. Everything and everyone is your mirror. It is only when you understand what it truly means to see yourself reflected back at you, that there is no room for blame, there is no room for judgement and there is no room to feel like a victim of another person's actions or words. There is only room for real love based on understanding and gratitude. Compromise comes easy, forgiveness is a given and growth is inevitable. While this truth applies to all of your relationships, from your family, to your friends and colleagues, and even to those you deem your "enemy", it is your relationship with your significant other that enables you to take the closest, most accurate look at who you are.

When Only the Face Seems to Change: It is certainly no secret that all your intimate relationships tend to be similar. Surely you have noticed how the fundamentals seem to remain the same while only the face changes. The repetition of the same problems, the same feelings and the same insecurities often leave you despondent and even reluctant to try again. You surrender yourself to the belief that relationships are difficult and require much compromise and that the only relationship secret out there is luck, timing or even Divine Will. You can't help but notice how what starts off with such hope often ends with no hope at all.

There is One Common Denominator: What you perhaps haven't noticed though, is that in all these repetitive relationships there has always only been one common denominator - YOU. Whoever the person is that you have next to you, no matter how many times you change him or her, the fundamentals of your relationship will remain unchanged (albeit to varying degrees) because they are simply mirroring you. It can be no other way. This realisation may frustrate you at first and you may even reject the truth that everyone is your mirror. However, you will quickly come to see it as great news because it means that you too can enjoy those loving relationships that previously seemed out of reach. To do so, the only person you need to influence is yourself.

What are You Really Seeing in the Mirror: To internalise this truth, that everyone is your mirror, you must first understand it. Your relationships with others are your opportunity to experience yourself and grow. They are a perfect mirror of your inner relationship with yourself and the beliefs you have acquired about life and love. Everything you admire in another person belongs to you and the same goes for all that which you dislike. In order for you to recognise a certain quality in another, then it must be part of your consciousness. You could not see it otherwise. Essentially, the bottom-line cause of break-ups and divorce, is when one or both of the partners can no longer stand to see themselves in the other person. To best understand how everyone is your mirror, think in terms of these three categories: your beliefs, your qualities, and your actions.

1. Your Beliefs are Staring You in the Face: Your beliefs about relationships, about men, about women, about love and life in general are all there for you to see in your relationships. We have all acquired certain beliefs throughout our lifetime that cause us to react and act in certain habitual ways that either support us or don't. This is most notable in our relationships because in order to experience anything or anyone you must first relate to it. For instance, if you believe that men or women are not to be trusted (no matter how trustworthy you are), or if you yourself have been willing to be the "other woman" or "other man" in the past, then by the Law of Attraction you will attract relationships in which a lack of trust is a major issue because that is where you have chosen to vibrate. Even if your partner is being faithful to you, you will look for reasons to prove otherwise and, as the saying goes, you always find what you are looking for.

Where Did Your Beliefs Come From? The problem is that you did not consciously choose many (if not any) of those beliefs that govern your experiences and relationships at the subconscious level. Instead, your beliefs were, unbeknown to you, handed to you by society, the media, your parents and your friends. There are also those beliefs that came part and parcel with your culture and upbringing, and the stricter your culture in the area of relationships, the more ingrained those specific beliefs. Since your relationships are based on those beliefs, your experiences only prove to re-enforce them for you, thereby creating something of a virtuous or vicious cycle depending on whether your beliefs support a healthy and balanced relationship or not.

2. Owning Up to Your Qualities: Every quality that you see in your partner, whether you admire it or not, is your mirror - it is showing you who you are. The more you dislike a certain quality, the more it is showing you a part of your consciousness that you are not acknowledging. For instance, if you dislike your partner's jealous nature, you will find that you too are jealous perhaps not of him or her but of others. If your partner's competitiveness annoys you, you will find that you too are competitive. If your partner's negativity or insecurities get you down, you will find that you too have a negative nature and the same insecurities. The only reason that these qualities are annoying you is because they are also yours. As long as you do not acknowledge them as your own they will continue to frustrate you, while owning up to them provides you with the chance to grow.

When Positive Qualities Annoy You: Interestingly, you may find that even some positive qualities annoy you. For example, if your partner's overly kind and giving nature frustrates you, it is showing you that you too want to become more kind and giving but are resisting doing so. Alternatively, your partners' ability to forgive may make you uneasy. Instead of becoming frustrated, see it as an opportunity to learn forgiveness. This ties into why opposites appear to attract as explained later in this article.

3. Your Actions - How Do You Treat Yourself and Others? When your partner acts in a particular way that upsets you, you will find that you too act in the same way, most likely not towards him or her but towards yourself and probably others. The more a particular action frustrates you, the more it reflects a part of you that you are not owning. If your partner treats you with disrespect, look within yourself and see who you treat with similar disrespect, whether it be a friend, a family member or yourself. If your partner criticises you, you will find that you are critical of yourself and most probably of others. If your partner ignores your needs, you will find that you too ignore your own needs or those of others. Ultimately, you teach others how to treat you by how you treat yourself.

Reconciling Opposites Attract with Like Attracts Like: You may have heard that opposites attract and indeed this often appears to be the case. So how can relationships always be your mirror if opposites attract? The answer lies in the Law of Polarity that states that "everything is dual, everything has poles; everything has its pair of opposites; opposites are identical in nature, but different in degree". In other words, qualities that appear to be opposites are in fact two extremes of the same quality. For instance hot and cold may appear to be opposite but are varying degrees of that which we call temperature. The same applies to all human qualities and emotions.

You may find that the quality you see in your partner appears to be the opposite of your own quality, but in fact it is the same quality expressed in a different way. It is still your mirror. For example, the introvert attracts the extrovert, the weak attracts the strong, the giving attracts the taking. Such seemingly opposite partners attract each other so that they can learn from each other and bring their own extreme quality into balance. In order to attract your opposite, you yourself have to be at the other end of the spectrum and so are unbalanced as far as that quality is concerned. Simply put, opposites attract in search of balance. When none of your qualities are at either extreme of the spectrum, then you can no longer attract its opposite.

Abusive Relationships are No Exception: This advice is aimed at healing and transforming your relationships. Emotionally and physically abusive relationships are no exception. Their reflection is no less accurate than that of any other relationship. At the root of abusive relationships you will usually find a severe lack of self-worth in the abused partner, which is re-iterated by their refusal to leave the abuser. The only way to rise above such relationships is through the power of self-love. In fact, it is the foundation of this great secret that everyone is your mirror.


by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
THE FOUR AGREEMENTS
Understanding how to Integrate and Live the practices

Upon reading don Miguel’s wisdom many people have their eyes opened to a new possibility for living life. They get excited when they see the potential for happiness, love, and respect with themselves and their relationships. What they fail to see is the challenges and resistance the mind will have to living just one of the agreements. Don Miguel briefly mentions these challenges in his book, but people fixate on the four chapters with the agreements and seem to miss these other important points. This is often the set up for expectations that lead to disappointment and frustration.

Domestication

During our early life we began making agreements. Our parents rewarded us when we did what they wanted and they punished us when we didn’t. We also learned behaviors and habits in school, church, and from other adults and children on the playground. The tools of reward and punishment were often emotional and sometimes physical. The impact of other people’s opinions and reactions to us became a very strong force in the habits we created. In this process we created agreements in our mind of who we should be, what we shouldn’t be, who we were, and who we were not. Over time we learned to live our life based on the agreements in our own mind. We learned to live according to the agreements that came from the opinion of others. In this process of domestication it turns out that the choices we make and the life we live is more driven by the opinions we learned from others than one we would choose on our own.

Why Living the Four Agreements Is Such a Challenge

We have out of years of habit not paid attention to how we express our self. The responses that come out of our mouth are often automatic. They were learned from years of habit living by the agreements we learned. We do not consciously choose our words, or the emotion, tone, and attitude that we express.

Over years our mind has filled with beliefs that generate incessant thinking. In all that thinking we have many assumptions that we are not aware of. We even make the assumption that what we think is true. We imagine and assume what others think of us and how they will react. We also assume that the judgments and self criticisms we have are true. We have learned to make so many assumptions that we aren’t aware of. These assumptions are not the truth. These assumptions and the faith we express in them is just one way that we are not impeccable with our word.

Through our domestication we have also learned to take things personally. We assume that when someone has an opinion about us that their opinion is valid. Their opinion becomes our belief about our self. We end up having an emotional reaction to our own belief because we assumed their opinion it is true. We can also take personally our own opinions. We take personally our own self judgments. These self judgments are nothing more than an assumption. Over years the mind has developed many habits of making assumptions and taking them personally.

Just because you adopt the Four Agreements doesn’t mean that all these habits in the mind will stop with that commitment.

When you decide to change your life and adopt the Four Agreements you are challenging the beliefs you learned and the habits you practiced since your childhood domestication.

Adopting the Four Agreements creates a conflict in the mind between expressing your self Impeccably with love and your existing fear based beliefs.

Avoiding Double Jeopardy

One of the hidden assumptions that people often make when adopting the Four Agreements is about time. Without awareness the mind makes the assumption that they should immediately be able to keep the Four Agreements 100% of the time. The mind completely ignores that there are already existing agreements and habits of taking things personally that have been in place for years.

With the expectation of the new agreement that we will not break any of the Four Agreements we are set up for failure. We have an emotional reaction and take something personally which feels bad. (but is completely normal part of our old habits) But then the inner judge reprimands us for failing to not take something personally. Now we feel twice as bad. The inner judge tells us that we failed and the voice of the victim in the mind accepts this proposal.

The result is that we are not only upset, but we also feel like a failure. If you just look at your emotional state at this point it will seem like things are getting worse instead of better. It can seem like attempting to keep the Four Agreements is causing more problems and making you feel worse.

If you are aware that you are judging your self for taking something personally, you can feel even worse. Your inner judge might use that awareness to judge and reject your self for judging your self for taking something personally. In the beginning the myriad of voices in your head are likely to use your new found awareness as material for self judgment. This is when the fourth agreement, Always Do Your Best, is most important. It gives you immunity from self judgment. Your best isn’t perfect practice of these agreements on day one. Your best will include a lot of stumbling in the beginning and improve over time as you practice. Just like walking, learning a language, or playing a sport, you can’t play at top level on your first day learning.

Awakening

In actuality the problem is not that you adopted the Four Agreements. Nor is the problem that you are a failure. What is really happening is that you are having an awakening. You are waking up to how your mind makes assumptions, has emotional reactions, and is so quick to make self judgments. These realizations about the belief system in your mind are not usually pleasant but are part of an awakening. It is usually uncomfortable realization, but through it your awareness is growing.

With some more awareness and practice you can move beyond this uncomfortable awakening about the mind. You will come to see that it is not You that is judging your self for failing. It is the inner judge. With practice you will see the ridiculous expectations and assumptions for what they are and not feel like a failure when you lapse in your journey to impeccability. This comes as you gain more awareness and gain more personal power over your agreements.

The Challenge of a Spiritual Warrior

Don Miguel refers to some of these challenges throughout the book. However, in the excitement of the Truth in what don Miguel writes, people often overlook where he points out that this endeavor is not easy. The agreements may be simple, but he never says they are easy to keep.

At the same time living the Four Agreements has taken me on the most rewarding and profound journey of happiness and fulfillment beyond anything I could have imagined. The hard work in the beginning is rewarded to me in every interaction every day of my life. This is a very big return for a small investment of time and effort.

Don Miguel refers to people who decide to adopt the Four Agreements and create love and happiness in their life as Spiritual Warriors. It is Spiritual because it is about living your Life. It is also referred to as a war because you are challenging the old fear based beliefs in your mind. It will take more than a week and a half to break free of fear, the tyranny of the inner judge, and old emotional habits. There will be some battles lost along the way, but that is of minor concern in the longer term strategy of creating happiness in your life.

The Quest for Personal Freedom

The quest of a Spiritual Warrior is for Personal Freedom. Personal Freedom means freedom from fear, illusions, and the fear based beliefs in the mind. In essence it means to win the war over the beliefs in the mind. It is with Personal Freedom that we are free of the human condition of emotional suffering. Spiritual traditions around the world have their own names for this state of awareness including nirvana and heaven. It is a state that is simply described as living your life with unconditional love, gratitude, and respect, for your self, and for others.







by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
THE FOUR AGREEMENTS
In the best selling book The Four Agreements don Miguel Ruiz gives four principles to practice in order to create love and happiness in your life. Adopting and committing to these agreements is simple. Actually living and keeping these Four Agreements can be one of the hardest things you will ever do. It can also be one of the most life changing things you will ever do.
As you practice living these four practices your life will dramatically change. In the beginning these new habits will be challenging and you will lapse countless times. With practice these agreements become integrated into your being and every area of your life and become easy habits to keep.

The Four Agreements are:

1. Be Impeccable with your Word: Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the Word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your Word in the direction of truth and love.2. Don’t Take Anything Personally
Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.

3. Don’t Make Assumptions
Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.

4. Always Do Your Best
Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse, and regret.
by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
The Masculine and Feminine: Part 1 The Re-turning

If the goddess must return, where has she been and why did she leave? Perhaps she was offended at our arrogance and lack of humility and therefore withdrew her powers into the earth until we are more worthy of her presence. Or perhaps she is too delicate, her senses too refined for this materialistic world and she languishes on some subtle planes waiting for us to become less materialistic and gross. One scenario makes her haughty, the other weak when in reality she is neither. The equivalent in the masculine story line is the angry judgemental god retiring to his cloud in disgust and hurling the occasional lightning bolt - or the luciferian rebel who descends into the earth and tempts us, delighting in our weakness and selfishness.
by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago
AMAZING! Orangutan asks girl for help in sign language

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G32YehcdUAw



by Sanziana United Kingdom 1 year ago

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